Skinned Knee Drama

At least once a year we provide respite for the Blasco family. Barb and Rich take a much needed vacation, while Art, Kate, I, and our two four-footers move into their home to take care of their daughter. Kathryn is a 39 year old blue-eyed beauty who has been disabled since birth. You can read all about her in this book that Barb wrote titled: It's a Girl...But Will She Live?

We recently spent 13 days at their home. Our daily routine during the work week is this: I leave for work first. Kate and Kathryn attend the same Day Program, so the bus picks them both up and delivers them to Marc. Art cleans up around the Blasco home and then heads back to do what he needs to do at our home and takes the four-footers with him. He is then back to the Blasco home by 3 pm to get the girls off the bus and feeds them. I get back there around 6 pm and he feeds me. We get up and do it again the next day.

On the second Monday we were there, Kate fell while at Marc and scrapped her knee

pretty good.  She has very poor vision and if her glasses are dirty well...  Also, she is so busy moving onto the next person to talk to or catch up to someone, she doesn't see where she is putting her foot and does fall often. She is always in a hurry to get through life!

She told me she couldn't go to water aerobics because of her knee (which she first identified as her toe, then her ankle, finally her knee). I told her we would put some Neosporin on it and it would be fine.

Art called me later that day. He said Kate was "very concerned" about her knee. When she is "very concerned", she is usually crying and talking at the same time. She was sure that she couldn't go into the pool with it like that. He said he thought she wanted to loose the leg so she could go do her water aerobics. I was like what are you talking about. He said she asked him to bring poison back from the house to put on her knee so she could go into the pool.... Poison I said?  ...  Oh - she meant Neosporin! Which I guess when Kate says it sounds like poison.  

Of course we will now call Neosporin "poison" and smile.

Kate's memory is amazing, some days.

Kate and I were at a fundraiser Walk for Autism on a chilly Sunday morning. We had gotten there early to help set up and Kate was busy helping stack the coffee cups to give away and tape the signs. It was colder than I thought so I was just walking back to my car to get a jacket when I saw a familiar face walking towards me.

Cliff Hoffman and his family attended a church we previously attended, Skokie Valley Baptist Church. Cliff is an avid bike rider and he would stop by our house once in awhile for a Black Cow after we moved on to Cornerstone Church. He and I were friends on Facebook so he knew that we would be a the walk, and the staging area was walking distance from his house.

As we walked towards Kate together I was hopeful that she would remember him without any prompts - and she didn't let me down. As we got closer you could see her looking at us and you could almost see the roladex in her brain spinning as she was searching to put his face with a name. As we got closer we heard her says, "Cliff?" She sure enough remembered him and joy on his face was beaming. Of course after that I was chopped liver - she only wanted to be with her buddy Cliff.

Cliff had been involved in a rather serious bike accident and he was starting to get a headache. So before we started the walk on the trails, he said his good-byes and headed back home. 

Sometimes the memory of that girl is just amazing. The 2.5 mile walk was on the bike trails through the forest preserve in Cook County. Kate was walking, and talking, holding my hand when she looks at me said, "I broke my glasses here." It took me a minute to realize what we was talking about.

When Sarah was a Girl Scout in grade school, Kate, Patty and I would tag along to be helpers to the leader. One of these times we were walking on a bike trail, very similar to the ones we were on that day, and Kate stepped off the side of the trail and fell onto the gravel area... and broke her glasses.

So even if she has no idea what time is, or how long it is until the next month or Christmas, or the answer to the question she asked 5 minutes ago for the 100th time, her memory for people and places is remarkable. And again she used her memory to share her joy with her old buddy Cliff on a chilly day in May. She still sends him videos on Facebook, telling him she misses him or get well, or Happy Birthday. Thanks for sharing the joy Kate. And thank you Cliff for loving my Kate.

Who was I kidding?

In an effort to and get in shape at this old age, I thought I would try water aerobics. While

pondering the idea, I thought - why not see if Kate and Patty want to join me. I ran it by them and they were both up for it, Kate more enthusiastically than Patty I will admit. When I signed up, I realized that I kinda knew the instructor as she attended the same church and we played on an adult baseball league together when we first moved to Arizona. Cool I thought, it is always easier going into something new when you know someone.

I sent Coach Gloria a quick note via Facetime Messenger and told her we had joined her Tuesday and Thursday evening classes. I explained a little about us and said we would stay to the back and try not to disrupt class… who was I kidding.

The first night there we realized in the back of the class was deep water, so we staggered, shorty (Kate) in front of me, and the giant (Patty) behind me. I felt like I spent most of the first two nights just trying to help Kate do the motions, not splashing the nice lady next to her and telling her not to answer all the rhetorical questions that Gloria asked us. She moved the entire class, and talked the entire class, but movement was the goal. I told Patty you will only get out of this what you put in it, coordination is not a quality she enjoys, but told her to just keep pushing through and moving! 

Kate would say “This is hard.” Gloria heard her and said, “Kate, not hard - Fun”. Throughout the evening Gloria would say - “Kate, what is it?” and Kate would holler “FUN”. Most of the ladies chuckled or agreed with her. I must say it was harder than I ever imagined. I was a wet noodle getting out of the pool. Kate on the other had was her happy self. She thanked Gloria and said “Good-bye everyone” as we rounded the corner to the showers. 

I had her shower there with her suit on, killing a whole flock with one stone (body, hair, suit). It is a small shower area, only three nozzles that you have to keep hitting to keep running, a new concept for her. The first night she kept telling me it broke. When she was all out of bubbles, I had her over by me and drying her off. One of the ladies walked by and said something smells good. It was Kate’s three in one shampoo, conditioner and body wash. Kate said, “that’s me.” Then when everyone else came through the showers, she would just say “that’s me”, they didn’t have to say she smelled good, but of course they didn’t even know what she was talking about!

On the third night, Coach Gloria suggested I not try to help Kate so much. She seemed to think she would do fine on her own. She said she had a Niece with disabilities and had worked with the disabled in the past (explains her patience). She said sometimes Moms and Sisters feel like they have to protect others from her, she is welcomed here.. let her go!

So we did. I need to stop here and thank each and everyone of you ladies in the pool last night who very patiently told Kate what you were going to do on Saturday when she asked.

She did pretty well I must admit. There were times when I went past her and said “stop talking” hoping not to get in trouble from Coach Gloria and to give the lady she had hijacked a chance to get away. I would hear the ladies telling her what a good job she was doing. One lady said you are like a rock star! She giggled so loud - my heart flip flopped.  Since we didn’t try to corral Kate last night Patty and I were separate also. It warmed my heart to hear her loud laughter coming across the pool. She was enjoying herself, or laughing at lack of coordination, either way it was laughter!

I’m not sure what was said in the shower last night, Kate was under the water and said she was sorry to another lady for something.  Of course, my Mom ears perked up.  But the lady said, “don’t be sorry honey, you make me happy.”  Patty looked at me and we just smiled at each other.

There she goes again, sharing the joy.